People who set alarms at 6:00, 6:05, 6:10, 6:15, and 6:20 are not planning to wake up. 😭⏰

They are entering negotiations. That is not an alarm system. That is a peace treaty with the worst version of yourself. The first alarm is symbolic. The second is a suggestion. The third is emotional foreshadowing. By the fifth alarm, your phone is no longer helping you. It is filing a complaint. And somehow, you still wake up at 7:04 in a panic with one sock on and no understanding of how time works. 🫠 The funniest part is the confidence the night before. “This time I’ll wake up early.” No you won’t. You scheduled a tiny war and gave the enemy snooze access.